Thursday, June 26, 2014

Lucas Meets his Great-Grandma and Family!

2 weeks ago Lucas and I flew to Illinois so he could meet his great-Grandma, Grandma Cukoo as we call her. (She gets the name not because she is a cukoo, although she is a little a fun-kinda-crazy way, but because she and my grandpa have a cukoo clock.)  Anyway, Lucas was born on a Monday and two days later my grandma was admitted into the hospital.  While those first few weeks were a blur with us having a newborn, having my in-laws visit us AND trying to pack AND move into our house, there were also a lot of emotions as my grandma and I are very close and she was in the hospital and I couldn't go see her or even really talk with her! We were all very afraid we were going to lose her and I was afraid I wouldn't get to see her again. We checked with the pediatrician who said it wasn't wise to fly with a newborn during flu season. Grandma was in the hospital for several weeks then she was transferred to rehab where she stayed several more weeks. While she was recovering each day, it was still hard for us to be so far away.  So Jason booked me a flight for that first week that I was done with school so Lucas could meet his great grandma. Of course I wasn't going to take a 5 month old on a plane to Chicago for just a day so we booked my travel for 3 days which meant we also got to see my brother's family who still hadn't met Lucas yet and the rest of my family.  It was the perfect (though extremely exhausting for Lucas) 3 days of family introductions!

I was so worried about the flight but this little guy was perfect!  I got there late because I thought my flight was 30 minutes later than it was so I walked up to the gate and basically had to board immediately.  I had to go to the bathroom so bad, I had planned to pump since I was giving him bottles instead of nursing on the flight, I was starving (I had only a small packet of oatmeal for breakfast 5 hours earlier), and was dying of thirst.  Not the best way to board a 2 1/2 hour flight!  But Lucas was so good.  He was smiling at everyone on the flight.  To the point where it was awkward because he wouldn't look away from people, just smiling and entertaining them!  

He did finally fall asleep...on the descent!  He slept about 10 minutes of the entire flight...but oh he was such a happy little baby, I didn't care one bit!  I even changed him in the bathroom since I obviously didn't have time before we boarded the flight.  Pretty sure he smiled through that as well.

Had to introduce Lucas to Portillos...he was trying to help me eat my shake. 

Absolutely precious.  Words cannot explain how I felt this moment. <3

Grandma wanted a picture with Grandpa too. I know Lucas would have loved his great grandpa too!!

4 generations - I'm so thankful for this day of our lives!

Also had to introduce Lucas to my favorite "Uncle Julio's"

Meeting his cousins and Aunt Tiffany for the first time! 

and meeting Uncle Shawn too

Kaylee loves her cousin, Baby Lucas.  She had fun trying to swaddle him in her purple blanket.  Lucas was a trooper being a newborn baby. 

Me getting snuggles from my nieces - they're growing way too fast1

Meeting Mandy then more snuggles with Papa! 

Buddies already :)

Lucas loved making Grandma and Papa smile 

Celebrating my Uncle Dennis' birthday -- Lucas was absolutely exhausted by this time and slept through the entire dinner, he was asleep more this day than awake!

Uncle Dennis and Aunt Marilyn finally meeting Lucas once he woke up!

Lucas being introduced to my cousins and aunt and uncle - I love for this brief moment that he was the center of attention.  Yet he was busy looking at something in the sky! I'd say he must take after his dad and not like attention but we all know he loves any attention he can get!

 Lots of loving from everyone

Reading time with Karrie and Acilia. 
Even Missy stopped by!

Lucas wouldn't stop watching the kids jumping on the trampoline so I brought him over and the girls all stopped jumping so they could talk to him.  It was the cutest. :) Kristin wanted to hold Lucas, despite Luke's face he was loving every second. 

Kristi and Lucas (thanks Kristi for hosting!)...Dad and Lucas celebrating Father's Day a day early

Papa and his grandkids

Love this pic - cousin love! I saw pics of Kaitlyn from last year and Lucas looks just like her.  They just have different eyes.  

Uncle Shawn and Lucas

Family photo!

The flight home was a different story.  He was so tired from the trip so he wasn't his happy smiley self.  He didn't cry much but was more fussy and he slept for over an hour of the flight which was great because he needed the sleep and I was so worried he was going to cry the whole time.  I was really relieved when I got off the flight.  It was such a great trip and I am so thankful for the time I got to spend with my grandma and that Lucas got to meet her.  It was also wonderful to be able to see family and introduce Lucas to everyone! 

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Schools Out!!

School is out for summer!! And in my case, it is out for pretty much ever...or until Jason and I decide otherwise. And I am just a bundle of emotions. I have been counting down until today since pretty much the day I found out I was pregnant. I had always known that I would want to spend as much time with Lucas so after we had them I decided that I'd go back to work and see how it was before making any decisions about being a full time mom...full time teacher or even half time teacher. Both those days leading up to going back to work pretty much made me cry daily because I really did not want to leave Lucas home. I knew I would miss out on many milestones and knew my time with him while he was awake was extremely limited. (about 3 hours max and that was if he didn't nap when I got home.)

Well, about a month ago Jason and I decided with Gods help that it would be best for me to stay home with our Lucas and focus my time on being a mom. I cannot tell you the joy that has come just from making that decision and knowing that limited time with him was just temporary. Every night I'd put him to bed I would count down the days until I knew I could do this without the heartache of having to leave him the next morning.

Well here we are on my last day of school and I don't even know how to feel! I cried when I pulled out of work. To say that I am excited to stay at home with Lucas is a huge understatement. It's what feels "right" for me in this time. I miss him every day when I am at work. Add to that the amount of money that I am making after childcare it wasn't much of a question. (my paycheck was just barely covering the cost of childcare.) Plus as anyone would imagine...teaching kids with special needs isn't the type of just you can just show up to and leave at the end of the 9 hours shift.  Even when I didn't physically take work home, I was taking it home mentally. But that's really neither here nor there. The decision to stay home was truly because I want to spend as much time with Lucas as possible.

But I worked so hard to get my degree in teaching! I worked so hard to get that first teaching job. I put my heart and sole into these kids (and their parents!) this year. I have followed Gods call to these kids and while I believe God is calling me to stay home with Lucas it's hard to just let that all go. Plus I know being a stay at home mom is a super scary, tough, exhausting job! As I type this Lucas will not nap and won't stop crying because he's over-tired. When you stay at never get a break! When they nap, it's time to do everything you couldn't do when they were awake. I just know I have a very tough job awaiting me...and it is pretty scary!

So I am all full of emotions but I I am super excited to stay home and watch Lucas grow. I'm so excited to get lots of extra cuddles and be the one to teach him all there is to learn about this world. I cannot wait to do all the things that stay at home moms do! Another chapter of my life is closing and I am excited to open this new chapter of mommyhood staying at home with the sweetest, cutest little almost 5 month old!